When you see a man opening a car door for a woman it can only mean 1 of 2 things. Either the car is new or the wife is.

Husband and wife are like liver and kidney. Husband is liver & wife is kidney. If liver fails, kidney fails. If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney. 😛

My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other — so now it’s just a waiting game. 😀

Wife : Do you want dinner? Husband : Sure, what are my choices? Wife : Yes and no.

Wife Running After A Garbage Truck: Am I Too Late For The Garbage? Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet..Jump In Fast!!!!!!!!

Wife: Yesterday’s night I saw a dream that you were sending me Jewelry and clothes! Husband: yeah, I saw your dad paying the bill !!! 😛

Why in wedding ceremony woman sits on left and man on right?? Because according to balance sheet all assets are on right side and liabilities on left side.! 😛

A true husband is one who lays down the laws for his wife and then accepts all amendments made by her! 😛